Never Accept a Rotten Tomato!

My Grandmother was one in a million.  She was loving, funny, and direct.  She would offer honest, actually brilliant, words of advice.  I can’t repeat some of her words-of-wisdom in writing as they are a bit “off-color”, but, there was always one piece of mandatory advice that she would offer publicly and consistently, “never accept a rotten tomato"!

Growing up, lunch out on Saturday was a pleasant ritual.  The relatives attending included at least 10 of us.  My Grandmother, her two sisters, four Aunts, two of which were named Anita - there was big and little Anita - big Anita was shorter but older; the whole thing confused me for years! Finally, rounding out the bunch were my 3 cousins and I.  We were the regulars.  We would meet at 12:30 in the afternoon each and every Saturday.

Lunch always included my Grandmother and her sisters having a loving argument about something or other, sometimes about something that happened 40 years prior.  Their sister-in-law would pick a side and at that point, it would get loud.  My “younger” aunts would discuss where we were going to go shopping after lunch and my cousins and I would watch in amazement and hope we were allowed a cookie from the bakery after we finished our lunch.

Inevitably, my Grandmother would order something that came with a slice or two of tomato.  She was particular about her tomato slice.  I can hear her say, “I don’t eat garbage home, so I won’t eat it out!”  Just as it was certain my Grandmother would order something with tomato, it was just as certain that the one of the tomatoes on her plate or one on someone else’s plate for that matter, would be unacceptable.  It would either be green inside or they would serve the end slice.  In any case, the tomato would have to be returned to the kitchen, but not before my Grandmother showed the tomato to the waitress, holding it up and proudly stating that she would not eat such garbage.

When I was very young, this ritual seemed funny. There was my Grandmother, holding a slice of tomato, high off the plate, displaying it with importance, explaining and illustrating why it was not up to par.  I didn’t fully understand why it was so important to her, or why she just didn’t refrain from ordering tomato, but as I grew older I began to understand.

My Grandmother lived through the depression.  She lived within a strict budget for most her life. When she was on Social Security, I remember her always stating that she was on a fixed income.  She felt that if she was paying for something, it should be worthy.  At home, she was just as particular and would never eat anything that wasn’t in top condition, so why would she do so when she was paying a premium?

My Grandmother wasn’t a big spender, but when she spent, she enjoyed it.  This is a great lesson for the economic times of today.  It’s not that spending is bad or evil, but when you spend; make certain it’s worthy.  Throwing money around on things that are poor quality is simply absurd.  And, if someone is passing something off on you that is not up to your standards, you need to stand up for yourself and not allow yourself to be pushed around. My Grandmother was a smart woman, one not easily taken advantage of by anyone, and that’s a great thing.

When I think about those long ago days, I now understand why that tomato slice was so important to my Grandmother and what lesson she was trying to teach us all.  Don’t let anyone give you anything less than what you deserve.  You don't need a lot, but be sure to enjoy what you buy.  And, in life, never accept a rotten tomato!