Two Years Ago Today

Two years ago today my Dad left this world. 

My Dad taught me so much.  He was not only a proud, strong man but also a kind-hearted, generous, considerate man.  His warmth and good humor were always something to count on.  I always felt protected and supported when my Dad was here.  He gave with his whole heart all the time.

Last night I woke up at 2:30 AM.  I starred at the clock and realized it was almost exactly 2 years from that hour since he died.  I could have sworn I saw him out of the corner of my eye, but when I looked again there was nothing there out of the ordinary. Some shadows from a pile of books reflecting the light of the night light, that’s all. 

Whenever I need or want to, I can imagine the feel of my Dad putting his arms around me, telling me everything will be okay.  I remember his face when he taught me to dance – he had such great rhythm and a special ‘dancing’ smile.  I remember watching the movie, Brian’s Song, with him.  We both sat on the floor in the den, wiping our eyes with tissues, talking about life, its joys and sorrows. 

I remember when he went in for his first open-heart surgery.  We all ran to the hospital to be sure to see him so very early in the morning.  As we walked, following along with his gurney to the elevator, I remember telling him I loved him.  I remember him looking at me and saying, “I love you.  You’ll always be my little girl”.  I kept those words close to my heart during the operation and still carry them with me today. 

I remember my Dad sneaking into the birthing room on the day my daughter was born.  He told the doctor he had something important to tell me.  He was right.  He told me he loved me.

I remember my Dad helping me when my son was born.  He would come over as he had just closed his store, and he would babysit so I didn’t have to wake my son to go pick my daughter up at school.

My Dad was the one to run around to every drug store in the area on the night before my wedding searching for something that would help rid me of a fever blister that appeared on my lip.  My Dad was the one who made a model of North Dakota with me for a school project.  He molded it, drew the rivers on it, and even stuck a tiny plastic deer to it to make it look more ‘real’. 

My Dad would sing Frank Sinatra songs loud and strong on Sunday mornings while he got dressed.  On our way home from my son’s apartment on Sunday, I turned, by accident, to the Frank Sinatra XM channel and heard, “My Way”.  The tears trickled down my cheek.  I tried to sing along, but my voice left me. 

After his Sinatra melodies, my Dad would go downstairs and make eggs for our Sunday morning breakfast.  He made the best eggs, rarely broke a yoke when making them sunny side up.  The eggs were like my Dad ~ always keeping his sunny side up.

These memories are just a few of the thousands that are popping in my mind.  There are so many examples I could give of the wonderful man my Dad was every single day.  The thoughtful surprises, his generosity, his love.  Whether good times or sorrowful times, my Dad’s love and support were a constant in my life.  He may not be here physically, but I have to say I feel his love and support with me every second.

Two years ago today the world lost a wonderful man, my Mom lost a thoughtful, loving husband my children and nieces and nephews lost what every child should have as a Pop Pop and my brothers and I lost an amazing, brave, strong, loving Dad.  Two years ago today he ceased being an ill elderly man and returned to being a strong, vibrant, funny, loving man, a man I will miss every day for the rest of my life.

I love you Dad ~ always and forever.