Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Working in a retail store that caters to children, Valentine’s Day is more about conversation hearts, stuffed animals and cards for giving to an entire class than about gifts for your significant other. We do carry a nice line of greeting cards, but other than that, if you want a gift for your sweetheart, I would suggest going elsewhere…
No matter what you're shopping for, or doing for that matter, attitude is so important. A pleasant attitude makes such a difference to not only the parents, but also the children, who find they have necessary shopping on their agenda.
I worked a lot of hours this week. From the moment I opened the store to the time I left for the evening, the store has been full of parents and grandparents coming in with their children or grandchildren and shopping for Valentine’s Day. Some with smiles, some with growls…. the choice is theirs; the impact of their choice affects all those around them.
Two days ago a harried Mom stomped into the store. She ignored the people waiting in line to purchase their items, and barked questions at me. “Where are your Valentine cards”? “Do you have gift bags”? “Where is the candy”? The snarl on her face was set, her eyes not even seeing the entire Valentine selection that greeted her entrance to the store, an entrance that was bright with pink and red hearts. She briskly walked right by everything without looking or seeing what was staring her the face.
The gentleman that was paying for his purchase at the time glanced over at the woman. I could see his visceral reaction. Without missing a beat, I simply responded to the woman’s questions, pointing out the rows of boxed cards and the displays of heart-shaped lollipops, etc. Without a thank you, she disappeared into the Valentine display, her designer purse flailing behind her and her son following as quickly as he could, head down.
After everyone waiting to pay was taken care of, I walked to the woman with the snarl. Her son was pacing back and forth picking up one item, moving it to another section, picking up something else, not saying a word or having a word spoken to him. The air between them was thick. I felt sad feeling this. If only this woman would recognize how fleeting this time is – if she would only take one small step back and look at her son, take his feelings into account, and realize he wouldn’t be her “little boy” forever. I asked her if I could help her find anything special. She didn’t look at me while she responded that she had to find cards for her son to give to his class and for her older daughter to give to her class. She didn’t want to spend “a fortune”, a fact that I could easily understand and relate to if not for the fact that every item of her outfit was designer, from her boots to her purse, (obviously not a knock-off), to her magnificent coat.
As more people were bringing their purchases to the register, I only had a few minutes to point out the Valentines’ that came with lollipops and then point her to the other choices that came with stickers. She wouldn’t have to do much more than buy the boxes.
I returned to the register to find another young mom waiting to make her purchases. With her baby boy sleeping soundly in his stroller and her daughter jumping happily up to the register hugging a giant stuffed pink monkey holding a heart closely to her chest, a heart that proudly stated, “I’m Yours”. The mom pulled out a package of cards that need to be cut out and colored in before being given out. She also purchased a brand new box of crayons. The mom looked at her daughter and told her how much she was looking forward to working on the cards with her. Her daughter smiled and held on even tighter to the cute stuffed animal. I suggested we cut the price tag off the animal so the little girl wouldn’t have to let go in order to buy it. “That’s a wonderful idea”, the mom told me! The entire purchase came to less than $8. The little girl walked out happy and the mom instructed her to hold on tight to the stroller as they left the store, all smiles.
The other mom was still deliberating between card boxes and talking on her cell phone to someone, complaining about all she had to do. Her son had moved on to the basketballs and was bouncing them across the floor. With one great bounce, the ball flew high in the air and knocked down an entire stand of “Angry Bird” gummy bears. The bags of sugary delights spread all across the floor. The mother, who hadn’t even known where her son was up to that time, started screaming at him at the top of her lungs. The little boy started to cry. I told him not to worry, that nothing had broken and maybe if he wanted he could help me pick up the bags.
His mom ended her phone call and started yelling at her son again. She told me that he needed to pick it up himself, that he needed to learn responsibility. As I represent the store, I obviously could not argue with the woman, but my heart broke as the little boy sobbed while picking up the candy.
I did turn to the woman and simply said that I needed to help him pick up the bags so that no one would trip. I then proceeded to help him, I just couldn’t stand watching him doing it all alone. Perhaps if she had been watching him, this wouldn’t have happened in the first place! As I piled the candy, I told him he could help put it back on the shelf and that he should do it in a color scheme that he thought would look nice. He smiled through his sobs. My day was made.
The mom finally picked out the Valentine cards for the little boy and his sister, who was not there. The candy was all cleaned up as the mess looked worse than it actually was, and I walked with them to the cash register. The woman paid for her items, the two boxes of Valentine cards and she had somehow picked up a case for her IPhone and a case for her IPad. She did not say anything to me, but she looked at her little boy and told him she would have purchased something for him if only he had behaved. She went on to say how he had embarrassed her and if it weren’t that he had to give out the Valentines, she would not have bought them.
The young boy then followed his mom out of the store. I watched as they walked into the parking lot, and then lost sight of them as more shoppers walked into the store.
Every so often I witness a mom who just doesn’t get it. She thinks her children will always be young, always be by her side, that they are her property, not individuals to be respected and appreciated. I understand that stress plays a part, but would love to explain that a change in HER attitude would turn these simple tasks into fun experiences to be shared instead of hassles to be endured. This reality makes me feel sad for both the children and the parent. I wish I could express to them that this time is so very precious. I wish I could communicate that they should appreciate every single moment and turn the everyday into memories to last a lifetime.
Luckily, more parents are like the young mom who was excited about creating a nice holiday, full of happy memories for her and her child. The majority of people in the store are happy and having fun and it is one of the great pleasures of working retail. I’ve grown to know many of our customers and their children and some days I feel like Willy Wonka in the Chocolate factory. It is then that I remember that these days are special for me, too. And just at that moment, if I receive a text from my son or my daughter, I burst with true happiness.
Have a happy Valentine’s Day!
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