This War on Christmas is Exhausting!!

It’s still dark in the morning when I get in my car and head to the store where I work. I have no choice but to wear a Christmas (holiday), red and white T-Shirt (normal is black and blue). This year’s Christmas (holiday) shirt consists of George Washington wearing a Christmas (holiday) cap. Our extended Christmas (holiday) hours exist to “make it easier” for the customers to get their Christmas (oops, I mean holiday again) shopping done. The fact that the extra hours of operation multiplied by the hundreds of stores brings in millions of extra dollars, ah, that’s just a side issue.



The fog has been extremely thick these early mornings due to the crazy warm December weather we’ve been having on the east coast ~ of course global climate change has nothing to do with that circumstance, (fa lalalala lala la la) ~ the drive is extra tricky and quite nerve racking.



Turning into the parking lot, I steal my thoughts and garner my energy. Eight hours is a long time to stand, day after day, continuously bagging large orders. The parking lot lights visible through the fog are decorated with Christmas (oops, I mean holiday) trees. The Christmas (holiday) garland is wrapped ever so tightly around each and every lamp pole making them look all ready for the Christmas (holiday) season.



Walking into the store, I trip over a box of to be unpacked Christmas (oops, there I go again), HOLIDAY ornaments. They will have to be squeezed into the already stuffed ENTIRE front section of the store that is full of Christmas (holiday) wrapping paper, pajamas, stockings, neck ties, cups, lawn decorations, gift bags, Santas, Reindeer, candy and other assorted Christmas, (holiday) stock. Wow, this war on Christmas is exhausting. Meanwhile, the Hanukkah end cap has wrapping paper with stars of David and a few mugs that say Oy. That’s it. There is nothing for Kwanza. That’s our “Holiday” section!!!!



After regaining my balance, I slide through the additional wall of Christmas (holiday) socks, gift tags, and gift boxes to make my way to the register. First thing I have to do is turn on the Christmas (holiday) music. Songs that mention sleigh rides and silver bells are one thing, but wow, that war on Christmas is really evident when all the songs that mention Jesus start playing! (Can you imagine a song mentioning Allah or Moses????? Me neither.)



To the tune of “Oh Holy Night”, I count the cash at my register as the Christmas (holiday) shoppers start their daily gift buying pilgrimage. Many customers this year are wearing a pin that says, “It’s okay to wish me a Merry Christmas”. To those people, just so you know, I will wish you a great day…no mention of Christmas will come from my lips because of your sanctimonious attitude. It’s very hard to feel bad for your holiday being under attack when everything Christmas is bombarding my senses from blinking red and green lights, songs about Santa, and Christmas just existing all around me!



I only wish those same people, wearing that pin, would be as willing to heed what I always thought to be the REAL, true meaning of Christmas all year round and not fight raising the minimum wage or having universal healthcare; in other words, REALLY caring about their fellow men and those less fortunate. But I guess the powers that be, those that make and promote slogans like a War on Christmas, don’t push that because there’s no profit in it.





At our store, we collected toys for two Christmas (holiday) charities. One charity gives toys to military families and the other is Toys for Tots. I think it’s really wonderful that we collect for these charities, don’t get me wrong, but what about needy children that may not be Christian? Should a retail store make it a point to accept donations all year round for all faiths? How about atheist children? How about poor children who can’t afford school supplies or birthday gifts all through the year? Wouldn’t that be a great “pro-life” thing to do? Also, shouldn’t the store give a discount if a person is donating to a charity? Isn’t it funny how the charities chosen coincide with the store’s profit motive? I ask the customers, would you like to donate to Toys for Tots? The customers say yes, they pick an item or two to donate, I ring it up at full price and put it in the box. Great for the kids, and I am happy for that….but also, really great for the company!! I am sorry, but I don’t call that charity, I call it-increased sales. The donation, in my opinion, should at least be given at a discount…but I digress.



Also, apparently, December 25th isn’t even Jesus’ birthday! Jesus was most likely born in March or November, not December. The only reason December 25th was chosen was apparently because it was already a popular day in Pagan religious celebrations as the birthday of the sun. Go figure ~ birthday of the sun or birthday of THE Son, hmmmm.) So, just like the trees, much of the celebration is a pagan holiday, so don’t get so insulted!!



The stress on the faces of so many customers this time of the year is apparent. They are stretched to the limit with not enough time, not enough money, and they get exasperated easily. Some people, on the other hand, are honestly very charming. I can see the holiday spirit in their faces, and they have yet to be wearing the pin telling me to wish them a Merry Christmas. They buy hundreds of dollars worth of toys to give to needy people in their Church. I truly admire that. To those folks, I will absolutely wish them a Merry Christmas, for they are showing the spirit of what the holiday is supposed to be about.



After my shift, I walk over the mess of the store and stop in the grocery store to pick up a few things for dinner. There, the Christmas (holiday) music is also blaring, the Christmas, (holiday) specials are piled by the entrance, the Christmas (holiday) aisle is straight in front of me, full of decorations, plates, candy, cards, lights……I go home, look for something to watch on tv…there’s Christmas specials, Christmas movies…..beautiful and charming and I absolutely love them, but don’t you see, there is no war on Christmas!!!!!!!



If there was really a war on Christmas, wow, we non-Christians are losing it badly. To all those who feel the need to substitute Christmas for holidays I say get a life. We all know your holiday rules this time of year, including you, and that’s fine. Being inclusive in the word only makes it a bit more enjoyable for those of us who don’t share the massive celebration. Preaching good will toward men while attempting to ban a religion that isn’t yours from entering our country, and cutting benefits for needy children, isn’t in keeping with the words you speak, the words you want respect for in your holiday celebrations. The “holidays” include New Years, think of it that way. There is no war on Christmas, the war exists nowhere but in your minds and on Fox news. Your holiday is THE holiday, we all live it ~ we get off work for it, even if we don’t celebrate it…we can’t shop or go out to eat on it (except for Chinese food) because the world shuts down. You don’t have to use your personal time for your holidays like the rest of us do. So be a bit giving this time of year and stop with your preaching of a war on Christmas when the world has exploded in an array of red, green, tinsel, and over-worked retail employees whose Christmas bonus consists of aching feet and a cookie.



The meaning of Christmas that I grew up with is a meaning that consisted of brotherhood, of kindness, of good will. The trumped up (I can’t believe I used that word) notion of a War on Christmas is a tactic, and way too many are falling for it. The only reason those of us who do not share in your holiday would like some small bit of accommodation is because in our country there is majority rule, with respect for minority rights. You are the majority, that doesn’t give you the right to force your Christmas off everyone’s lips. Donald Trump saying, if he’s elected everyone will say Merry Christmas, is against EVERYTHING we stand for in our country. Don’t let their manipulations allow you to lose sight of that. You don’t have the right to feel abused because your holiday IS everywhere, abuse doesn’t mean those who don’t celebrate it have to participate. So, let’s get back to the meaning of Christmas, share peace and love and good will toward ALL men. Let’s stop the endless chatter about a ridiculous war on Christmas and start fighting the war that does exist, the war on decency, respect, science and compassion. We’ll ALL be better off if we fight THAT war.





Thank you……and Happy ALL the Holidays.

We have so much to learn from the giant sequoia/redwood trees!!

Certain facts of nature are truly astounding.  I was amazed to learn that the largest trees on our planet, redwoods and sequoias, have a shallow root system.  It is truly miraculous that trees as majestic and grand as these could stand and thrive long enough to grow so large with such a shallow structure.  Common sense would seem to dictate that over the thousands of years that some of these trees have stood, storms, wind, rain, would have toppled them since their roots don’t stretch far into the earth.  But they do stand for centuries and they do withstand storms, and they don’t fall…why?

It seems these giant trees have an elaborate, far reaching, if not deep, root system.  Their roots grow more horizontally, they latch onto other roots from fellow redwoods or sequoias and their strength comes from their community. I suppose they truly live the saying, “United We Stand”!  What an important lesson to be learned here!  These root systems are large, extending over 100 miles.  They intertwine with the roots all around them.  Baby redwoods latch onto the root system at the base of their parents and obtain their nourishment to grow and thrive.  These trees grow in clusters shaped like circles, these circles are sometimes called fairy rings. What a beautiful image that captures the magic of what these forests must exude.  Someday, I would love to go see these giants.  What a sight they must be, what a feeling they must give!

One other fact that I find so interesting about these trees is their dependence on fires to periodically sweep through.  Something so frightening as a fire has to visit them or they would not survive!  Naturally, every 25 years or so, a huge fire would happen to burn through sections of the forest clearing out all the built up debris that would otherwise keep the sunlight from reaching the ground.  The sunlight is necessary for other plants to grow, plants that would never be able to exist without access to the sun.  The bark of the redwoods and giant sequoias are not immune to fire, but the living part of their bark contains no flammable resin and is extremely thick and durable.  Only the dead wood inside the tree will burn, leaving the living parts that much stronger!  After the fires clear the ground, seeds from the redwoods themselves could grow with an increased chance of survival.  The ash left from the fires would leave nutrients that would seep into the ground after a rain.  These nutrients are also necessary for plants to grow.

The fire that is so necessary to the survival of the forest can be equated to a society's need to clear out the old, built up, cluttered, archaic views of its' existence.  Just as this clearing makes the forest stronger, a rethinking of our world view could only make our lives richer and stronger. A re-evaluation of humanities reliance and interdependence on each other would make our shared lives together on this beautiful planet so much richer.  The 'baggage' being cleared from the ground of these majestic trees makes them all stronger.  This enables the sun to shine through, reaching and warming parts of the earth that need it to thrive and grow.  

As a people, we need to clear our thoughts periodically, and no longer functioning ideas need to be discarded.  Sometimes it takes a deep awakening to discover that we are all people who are connected to each other and we need to allow the sun and all the goodness that is so abundant in our world to shine and permeate all of our lives.  Only by making the best possible environment for all can we each live our best, most meaningful life.

Learning about these giant trees is so interesting, so poignant.  If only we, human beings, could truly take their lessons to heart.  Imagine if we lived our lives reaching out to others in order to be stronger, instead of digging deep and alone into our own small existence?  No one person, like no one giant tree, can truly survive all that life brings alone.  Imagine how much lovelier, how much calmer, how much safer we would all feel if we had an elaborate root system that kept us standing through rough times and nourished us all in good times!  Families and friends are a great source of this root structure, and would still be at the heart, but even there, in too many cases it’s my family vs. your family, or my country vs. your country, or my people vs. your people…when, in reality, we are all ONE.  If mankind supported and helped each other instead of hating and blaming and weakening; killing and destroying each other, wouldn’t we ALL be better?  If one giant redwood stole all the nourishment in the ground causing the other trees to fail, eventually, that giant would also die, so what’s the point?  Lifting others, not stepping on them, best shows strength.  Living life to the fullest involves being a part, not being separate.  In reality, there are not differences among us that really matter.  We all have the ability to capture the love in our hearts and give it freely, give it with every breath so we can all live our one life in peace, love and abundance.

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Five Below in Newtown is Closing This Week~

I’ve worked at my Five Below store for almost five years now.  Wow, time flies!!   

Thinking back to my earliest days at the Newtown store, when I thought it was a temporary position until I found a “real job” again; until now, when it has become a job I truly enjoy, the transformation in my thinking amazes me.  Life is weird that way I guess.  It brings you to a spot you never planned or expected and then you find it just might be the perfect place ~ a place you were meant to be.

Since I started working at the Five Below store in Newtown, I have had the pleasure of working with some amazing, hard-working, intelligent, thoughtful people.  From my first Manager, Lisa, who brought me in for the holidays as we were long time friends, to other managers from Richie, Megan, Kim, Brittany and John, my present Manager, I can’t begin to properly extol the virtues of these highly skilled people.  I know a lot of people don't think very highly of retail workers, but let me tell you, the talent, intelligence, hard work and personalities of each of these managers is at least as comparable as any of the very highly respected and well paid CEO’s and CFO’s of some of the other companies I have worked for previously.  They may not be given the high salaries and cushy comforts of those other positions, but they surely display the same insight and business acumen.

Managers at a retail store HAVE to be there.  They have to deal with and diffuse issues from difficult customers and irresponsible workers (not me of course.....haha) to finances, store maintenance issues, vender problems, staffing, and a myriad of other daily situations.  It amazes me the widespread and highly under appreciated talents these dedicated men and women utilize every single day.  While doing all of these tasks, they simultaneously have to schedule the store to run well with the hours allotted, they have to get shipment done, keep the store looking great, and make sure everyone is functioning in such a way as to give the store a glowing reputation.  They work long, long hours, weekends, nights, holidays…and through all of this, I have yet to work with a Manager at Five Below that didn’t excel at every aspect!  I don’t know if the hiring process is just that great or if Five Below just lucks out, but I have been honored and privileged to work with each and every Manager.

But, now, my store and my store alone, is closing due to circumstances surrounding the shopping center.  It is so sad.  Our customers have become true friends and they each come in with a story of how much they are going to miss us.  I know so many of them now ~ it’s such a warm, friendly relationship!  We greet each other with a cheery hello as through the years I have shared preparing for birthday parties, holidays, school starting, school ending…with them and their children!  I have watched their children grow from babies to now starting kindergarten!  They know I will go out of my way to help them and share a laugh and I know they will be happier when they shop with us than if they would go to some other big box store where they do not know or have any relationship with the sales associates.  Five Below truly appreciates their customers and they encourage their employees to show that appreciation.  I am proud to work for an organization that does this, it makes my day feel worthwhile and it allows me to be the helpful, kind lady at the store they all love so much.

I am truly emotional when I think about my last day at the store this Friday.  I have had the privilege of hugging many customers goodbye and they have promised to come see me and shop at my new store, the Five Below in Feasterville.  I am excited to be reunited with one of my previous managers, a true friend, a great worker and loving, wonderful woman, Megan.  It is the knowledge that I will be with her again that makes this whole experience that much better.  But, leaving my store (and I do consider it my store), leaving the customers, but mostly leaving the staff that has functioned as a close family, from Shane and Kayla, to Lisa and John…we have helped each other, laughed together, struggled together, boosted each other, and trusted in each other for quite some time now, leaving will be so hard.  We are a crazy, working family of sorts….I will miss each and every one of them.  I am glad everyone will remain employed with Five Below, they have not let any of us go, and because of that we will still be in touch.  I am very confident of that fact.

I suppose I am a very lucky lady as I have always found myself surrounded by caring, loving, wonderful people at work.  People who have become and remained enduring friends at each of my work experiences through the years.  I never expected that to be a benefit of working “outside the home” but it truly is one of the best.  I am grateful beyond my wildest dreams for the relationships I have built throughout my working life…from real estate, to Verispan, to Cognetx and now at Five Below.  I have learned so much from each and every company, from each and every person. 

Life changes all the time.  As I go to a new store, with many new co-workers and a new customer base, I will take with me all I have learned from each and every position I have held.  I will remember that even though retail workers are given little respect from many outside of retail, we know how hard we work and how varied the tasks are that fill our day and we respect and honor each other.

I hope Feasterville knows how lucky I feel to have landed with them.  I hope Megan knows how thankful I am that she has taken me as part of her staff.  I hope Five Below continues to grow and prosper as a company because they truly offer something special to every community they join; reasonable prices for necessary items, a staff that values their customers, and lots of fun.

Goodbye to Five Below in Newtown, to the store, to my fellow employees, and to the exceptional customers.  Thank you for the past five years.  It’s been so very great!  I've loved being part of the Five Below Newtown experience!!

Will This Winter Ever End?

The wind is blowing through my hair

The sky is dark, the trees are bare

The ice is crunching under my feet

The cars are skidding down the street.

Yes, winter’s here, seems like forever

My soul cries out for nicer weather!

So tired of worrying about the drive.

Just strive to stay alive past five!

The chill goes through, right to the bone ~

All things fun have been postponed

The ice is scraped from the windshield

Aha, clear glass is just revealed!

I start my car and as it warms

I turn on the weather ~ Oh no!! More storms!!

They’re heading straight for us again!!

Not sure how much or just quite when…

If I shut the news will it not be so?

My brain cries out, please, no more snow!!

But snow will come, with sleet and rain

Jeez, winter is a royal pain.

But, like everything it soon will pass

I can’t wait to once again see grass!

To not be cold, to sit outside

Visit the beach and watch the tide

Yes, spring will be here very soon

So no more doom and no more gloom

We’ll ride this out, stay safe for sure

Pretty soon we’ll smell the spring’s manure!!

And as we sit and try to chat

We’ll sniff and say, Yuck, what is that?

We’ll each make a strong, elaborate plea

Being sure to state, “It wasn’t me!”

The smell of spring will waft around

We’ll plant and fertilize the ground

The birds will sing, the bees will buzz

My hair will frizz, all full of fuzz

Just wait, and soon the sun will shine

Staying out until almost 9!

Yes, all things pass, so winter must

On that there’ll be no breach of trust!

An Orange Butterfly

Next month will be five years since I lost my Dad.  In some respects the time seems forever while in other respects, the memories of his last two weeks here, with us, are so very vivid, that I feel as though I lost him yesterday.

My Dad was absolutely central to who I am and what I value.  He was not only my rock, my security, he was my booster and my role model for the type of person I want to be.  He was funny and kind while smart and quick thinking.  He was the life of any party.  He was always trying to look his best, had a proper amount of self respect (without conceit) along with an enormous amount of respect for those around him.  He loved my Mom with all his heart and always told her how beautiful and terrific she was.  He loved my brothers and I and our families completely.  He was filled with pride over our triumphs and heartbroken over our heartaches.   He always made me proud.

After he passed, a friend told me that when I see an orange butterfly, my Dad was especially near.  Over the last five years I have been amazed at the appearance of orange butterflies at times when I either felt the need for my Dad especially strong or when speaking of him.  This was never more prevalent than two weeks ago when my husband and I took a trip to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico.  We were there to attend the wedding of beautiful friends.  We shared much of the vacation with one of my friends and her husband, (she appreciates her privacy, and I respect that quality, so I will not give her name).  I have known this friend since Kindergarten, which happens to be not only a few years ago but actually a few decades ago.  My friend lost her Dad a year ago from the Saturday we were away: so the timing of this journey was especially heart wrenching for her.  She, similarly to myself, was extremely close to her Dad and feels his loss intensely.  

Naturally, there were many, many times over the 6 days we were together that we talked of our fathers.  There were some memories over which we smiled and others that brought sweet tears to flow.   There were some memories we shared of each others Dads that brought laughter.  The miraculous thing was that almost every single time we spoke, an orange butterfly would flutter around us.  I can hear her say, “Shar, there’s an orange butterfly!!”  Was this just a coincidence? …. Maybe…. But, quite honestly, whether it was or it wasn’t it doesn’t really make any difference.   Whether it really was my Dad’s spirit or just a feeling of love and support from thinking of my Dad and feeling his presence…there is no difference.  Either way, the loving, supportive, strength of character was with me.  There was even a woman selling handmade items by the pool who had at least twenty ladies beach covers for sale.  All were random designs in various colors, but then there was one unique one, a beautiful orange butterfly gracefully flowing on the front. (Naturally I bought that one for my daughter).

Being in Cabo San Lucas was fun and wonderful.  Sharing the joy of my friend’s wedding was touching and heart-warming.   Looking back on the trip my husband and I shared with friends, I had a truly wonderful time.  Although I did feel a bit anxious traveling so far away from my children, (even knowing they are grown and more than capable)…it was just a “me thing”.  But, seeing the orange butterfly, it always appearing and being close by when needed, reminded me of qualities my Dad provided when he was physically here, making me feel stronger, capable and safer. 

I am one very lucky woman to have had the father I had.  When I think of him, which is so very often, and I feel him in my soul, I feel his love.  Just as he always tried to make things okay for me while he was here, I believe he is still trying to do that.  I hear him in things I say, I feel him in my heart, and I know his love is as close as ever.  I am so thankful to have been my Daddy’s little girl.  I am so thankful for the orange butterflies and all the feelings, even the melancholy ones, they bring to the front.  I miss my Dad every day, but knowing I carry him in my heart, and project his spirit to those around me, I am given wings.

A Letter to My Daughter

So many thoughts and feelings are running through my mind and heart, as we get ever closer to your wedding day.  I know I am normally an emotional woman who wears her heart on her sleeve; I can rarely, if ever, hide how I feel.  If I thought I was going to be able to conceal my emotions at this time, wow, was I mistaken.  They bubble up at the strangest times…in the shower, at the register at Five Below, even in my dreams…

The one thing I know for sure, I am absolutely unable to change that part of me.  When I try to ignore the emotions I feel, they just bust through like that proverbial bull in a china shop.  Because of this, I am going to lay my thoughts out here and hope that once they are written, I can be as normal as I ever am.  (Which is no where near normal)

My daughter, in less than a month, will be a bride.  It’s amazing to me, when I look back over the years how quickly they have flown.  It sounds so trite, but it is so true.  Lauren, I remember Dr. Landsberg saying, “10:46, it’s a girl”, like it was yesterday.  Labor, when Pop came in to say he loved me, listening to the Monday morning traffic as it whizzed by my hospital room, all those memories…how can they be from so long ago when I barely remember what I did last week?  My little girl, with the bonnets, to my best friend; you understand me sometimes better than I understand myself (and vice versa).  Since the day you were born, I thank G-d for you and Michael, every single day.  (I really do)

I don’t know why your getting married is so extra emotional?  You already live with your Sweetheart, the love of your life.  And, may I add at this point, that you made a perfect choice.  A little aside to Alex here….as a Mom, I couldn’t have chosen a better husband for Lauren.  I am so thankful, so totally proud and thrilled to welcome you as my newest son.  I love you and hope you know that I am honored to be your mother-in-law.  I hope to not fit into the stereotypical mother-in-law role.  Just know that even though I may be a pain sometimes…and I am certain those times will come…that’s just me being a Mom ~ but always know, I love you.  And always, just be you because it is your love, caring and thoughtfulness that has brought a light to Lauren’s eyes that fills my heart with joy.

Okay, now back to why I feel so extra emotional…I look at you, Lauren, and I see such an amazing woman!  You are smart, you are thoughtful, you are caring, you are funny and you have such a good heart.  And now, you will be a married woman!  Something about that is so deep.  I suppose because Daddy and I have shared so much ~ good times, hard times, happy times, and sad times, but always coming through together.  I see the life and the history that we have made so far and see you and Alex beginning that journey and I realize that you and he together will now truly begin your new, married path.  Even though your history started years ago, now is a new, different kind of start.  You will be husband and wife, and that public, legal commitment does change things.  I don’t know why it does, but it does. 

Our times together, our talks are always without reservation.  I don’t have to hold anything back when I talk to you.  You know my heart and you feel my thoughts.  You always know me and I always know you.  Although that won’t ever change, I want to tell you (even though I know you already know) that you now have a primary responsibility to Alex.  That’s the way it should be and that is the way I want it to be for both of you.  I know that shift happened a long time ago, as it should have, but it is the formality of your wedding day that brings that shift to the forefront. 

I am just so totally thankful that Alex is the man he is.  Aside from the big things he does to make you happy, like up-rooting his job and his home in NY to move to PA; it is the little things I observe like going out of his way to get you a dessert you mentioned you found interesting, bringing you flowers “just like this”, or saving his not spicy tortilla chips so you can soothe your mouth after hot soup…. all without your asking.  It is those actions that fill my heart with more happiness than I can say for I know that you will always have someone by your side that puts you first.  But that only works when you put him first.  And that is what will make your lives together a strong, beautiful, life-long love.

You are my daughter, and that fact fills my heart with a love and pride that only grows stronger and deeper with every second.  From the first time I held you I dreamed of all your milestones.  Well, your wedding day is probably one of the biggest.  Just know that Daddy and I will always be here for you and Alex.   Whatever you both dream, we dream for you.  Whatever you both hope, we hope, too.  Whatever we can do to help or make your path easier, we are here to do so.

You are my precious Lauren.  Thank you for being the most amazing, the most terrific, the most caring and the most perfect daughter.  You have always filled my heart with love and now I look forward to added love with Alex.  I look forward to sharing more milestones as you and Alex thrive together.

Be happy Baby.  Always remember to put Alex first, right up there with you.  Everything and everyone else is after that.  I love you both always.

Me? Thinking clearly?

I was just watching a bit of The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson.  I haven’t watched his show for a while and I truly forgot how much I enjoy his offbeat humor.  He is hysterical.  Anyway, in the opening segment of his show he reads tweets from viewers and answers their questions, very tongue in cheek.  One viewer wrote in to say they were getting married on Craig’s birthday and going to Scotland, (where Craig is from), for their honeymoon.  The viewer asked Craig for any advice he could give them.  He looked in the camera, tilted his head and with a wry smile answered, “Bring a hat!”

His answer made me laugh!  Bring a hat!  Sensible, but totally unexpected!  The clarity of his suggestion was stunning, and because of that, really funny!  Sometimes, my brain makes things so complicated, swirling ideas in my head that bump into other ideas, which cause me to go off in a totally different direction!  This, wear a hat idea, was so direct, so simple, it was perfection!

Two examples of this direct simplicity have appeared in my life recently and they both caused me see things with so much clarity it was calming!  Sometimes, my weird brain turns simple things into complex situations.  By clearing away the unnecessary debris and confusing side complications and then looking directly at the heart of the situation, things make so much more sense!  

I’m sure I have mentioned that Lauren, my precious daughter, is planning to be married this June.  Preparations have been ongoing for a year but are in ‘full speed ahead’ action now and the excitement and activities are building.  It is a fun, beautiful time and it is wonderful to know that she found the love of her life!   It is also wonderful that my husband and I love, admire and appreciate all the beautiful qualities of our son-in-law to be!!  He not only makes our daughter smile with her whole heart, he is a truly good, smart, caring, thoughtful man.  The love and joy he brings her makes our hearts full and we are so proud and so happy to welcome him into our family.

All this brings me to a situation that happened a few weeks ago.  While searching for a shirt to go with his tux, my husband, Dave, and future son-in-law, Alex went into Nordstrom’s.  My husband automatically went to the clearance rack where he found two shirts, one a bit too small and one a bit too big.  With sincerity, he asked Alex which of the two he should buy.  Alex heard him then easily and clearly stated, “Buy the one that fits”.  Wow.  With one sentence he cleared away confusion and showed Dave and I just how simple it was to do things the right way!  Why make a decision between two wrong choices when, if we just open our eyes, a right option is right in front of us!  Sure enough, not on the clearance rack, but about the same price, a shirt in the right size was sitting right there, just waiting to be purchased.  Alex’s answer was simple, it was perfect, it held no complications, and because of that, the solution was right in front of us.  All we had to do was clear away the unnecessary of what we didn’t need to find what we did.

The same straightforward clarity was brought to my attention at work.  I know I’ve stated before that I now, after years of all different experiences, work retail.  Well, in the course of my present position I am required to obtain emails from our customers.  After each transaction, I would previously ask, “would you like to give an email”, at which time most everyone said, “no”.  My email captures were low even though I truly did ask everyone. 

One day, our District Manager, Craig, was visiting our store.  Unlike Mike, our previous District Manager, when Craig visits it is productive, nice and helpful.  We look forward to his visits now, instead of dreading them with Mike, as we are now helped by his insights.  He brings clarity. 

Our company is stressing the importance of emails, as they are helpful in keeping our customers aware of our sales.  This knowledge is truly helpful to them as, if they think with simplicity; they do want to know what’s coming up because their children want what we have before we sell out!  Our customers’ knowing when our stock includes what they are looking for really is helpful to them!  However, at the check out all they can think about is that their in-box is full and it causes havoc.  Because of this our store’s email captures weren’t great and quite honestly I felt a lot of pressure for our low numbers since I probably handle more weekly transactions than any one individual.  Craig suggested, without lecturing and without blame, just with a smile, that I be simple.  Don’t ask for the email, just say, ‘email????’.  Simple, direct, to the point…and you know what?  It works!  Now everyone in our store does this and we were number 1 in email captures last week!  Amazing the turnaround that came out of such a clear, simple direction! 

Now, how to translate this into all aspects of day-to-day living?  Life is so complicated; there is so much to do and so many considerations to keep in mind each and every step of the way!  When thoughts jumble regarding all the obligations we have with people we love, people we work with, our time and our money constraints ~ it can all be so nerve-wrecking!  How to simplify?  How can we think clearly and cut through all the unnecessary?  How do we keep things on track and give everything the needed attention in its own time?

Simply being in this moment is so helpful.  Taking things one moment at a time, clearing away the debris that enters your head when thinking too far in the future.

I know I have to stop and think in the moment.  What do I need to get accomplished today, then break that down to what needs to be done this morning, this afternoon, this evening?  I know I have to prioritize, and sometimes I feel overwhelmed because EVERYTHING seems of such vital importance!  But, all it really takes is to de-clutter.  Just like I am trying to get better at throwing things away that are no longer relevant, I have to keep remembering to throw thoughts away that are no longer relevant.

Just like not looking at shirts in the wrong size and expecting that wrong size to somehow be right…or not making a request for emails so much more complicated than it is, looking at what is in front of me right now helps clear away the myriad of plans and activities that jumble in my head when I think of all that is coming up.  The jumble that keeps me from seeing clearly and accomplishing what needs to be accomplished! 

So, make things simple.  Clear away the unnecessary and get to the heart of the issue, and, never forget to laugh at the simplicity of life.  Like Craig Ferguson says, it comes down to when traveling where it rains,  “bring a hat”.

I Never Learned the Song

In my mind's eye, I can imagine my Great-Grandmother, although I never met her as she lived in the mid to late 1800’s in Russia.  Although my Great-Grandfather had good profession, a tailor, it must have been a very difficult life.  As a Jewish family there were extra hardships that they endured besides the reality that life itself was not easy.

My Dad often told me a story about a song my Great-Grandmother made up, a lullaby, that she would sing to her children at night when she put them to bed.  It was a song he knew well from his father…. also a man that I don’t remember as he passed away when I was two years old. 

This special song was sung in Yiddish, the language my father’s family mostly used when communicating. Whenever I would ask, my Dad, who had a really lovely voice, would sing the song to me, translating the words afterward.  Sadly, I never learned the song well enough to sing it myself.  (Not that my singing holds any talent)  The song, my Dad used to tell me, expressed the love of my Great-Grandmother for her children.  It softly conveyed how she wished them good health and strength.  The song went on to say how her love would be with them always and that she would keep them safe with everything she had in her.  All of her children had the memory of this song deep in their hearts forever.

Many years later, my Grandfather left Russia for a better life in “The Land of Opportunity”, America.  My Grandfather had fallen in love with my Grandmother, a woman who worked in the tailor shop of my Great-Grandfather.  Because of their love, he was forced out of the business.  In those days, status was held in very high importance and my Great Grandfather did not approve of my Grandfather marrying someone from what he considered to be a “lower” status.  My Great Grandfather as a sign of his disapproval blacklisted my Grandfather and my Grandmother from working in the tailoring business, the only business they knew.  Since they were unable to find work; they were forced to leave their home.

My Grandfather came to the United States first and opened his own tailor/manufacturing shop in Philadelphia.  He became a “Yankee Doodle Dandy”.  From everything I have learned of my Grandfather, he was a character.   He loved having the biggest, newest car on the block; he adored his children, and loved life in America.  I wish I could have known him.  I am sure that a lot of my Dad’s vivaciousness and warmth came from him.  The one thing my Grandfather perpetuated from his younger days, however, was the lullaby his mother sang to him.  My Dad told me that he sang the lullaby to him, his brother and sister and that when he did, he would have a wistful look, as if he was channeling his own mother.

When WWII broke out, my Grandfather still had family in Europe.  His nephew, Saul, unbeknownst to my Grandfather, was taken to a Concentration camp with his wife and daughters.  My father served in the army in WWII, but he never mentioned whether or not he realized that close family was being held in the Nazi camps.  Of course, being Jewish, there was a feeling of family in general, but of close relatives, I don't know if my Dad knew of them.

As it turned out, Saul suffered unimaginable loss in the camp.  His wife and daughters were slaughtered in front of him, but somehow, he managed to survive.  After the war, he knew he had an Uncle who lived on the east coast, somewhere, in the United States of America.  He found the means to make it here and started his quest to find his Uncle Joseph.

In those days, telephones weren’t in every home…they were in candy stores or other stores down the block.  Children would earn a penny running to someone’s house to tell them they had a phone call.  Saul took any job he could find as he searched for my Grandfather.  He worked his way along the East Coast calling every Joseph Snyder along his way.  He searched and searched as he took various jobs, moving from area to area.  He had learned the importance of family and needed to belong to one once again.

Finally, unfortunately I never learned how long it took him; Saul called the right Joseph Snyder.  Now, my Grandfather had “made-it” by his standards.  He had a successful manufacturing shop and felt like a wealthy man.  He didn’t know of any nephew that he had, let alone one that had been forced to suffer such horror as Saul did in the Nazi Concentration Camps.  (I remember seeing the numbers on Saul's arm, the "branding" of the concentration camp was with him his entire life.)  When my Grandfather was told there was a call for him from someone claiming to be his nephew, he was skeptical, to say the least.

Thankfully, my Grandfather took the phone call.  Saul must have told him all the names of his family in Russia, many of whom my Grandfather knew and many he had never known.  My Grandfather thought this could be some type of swindle…. he wanted proof, somehow some proof, that Saul was indeed his nephew.

It was then that Saul said, "I know something no one but Mishbukha,(family) would know, something that can make you feel sure I am who I say I am."  With that said, he started singing the lullaby that my Great-Grandmother had made up so many, many years ago in such a different world.  After hearing the first few lines of the song, my Grandfather joined in and together they finished the well loved lullaby.  He knew, from that miracle of a song, that Saul was his nephew and Saul was welcomed into the family from that day forward.

Before my Dad passed, I wish I would have learned to sing that oh so special lullaby. I can hear my Father’s voice, gentle, loving, but I don’t remember any of the words because it was more of a melody to me as the Yiddish was something I never learned.  My Dad’s sister, my Aunt Elsie, also knew the song and during one visit to her at her home on the bay, she sang it to me and my husband…. getting that same look in her eye that my Dad did.  They must have heard their father’s voice in their heads, as he heard his mother’s voice in his.  But, they learned the song and kept it going. 

Writing this blog is my way of keeping that very special song alive.  I may not know the words, but I understand the emotion of my Great-Grandmother ~ wanting to keep your children safe…and look how that song ended up keeping her grandson safe in some way in the end ~ helping him find his Uncle. 

I will always regret not learning the lullaby, and there is no way I could ever learn it now as everyone who sang it is gone.  Always take the time to learn from those you love while they are with you.  I will always wish I had learned to sing my Great-Grandmother’s song ~ I hope this blog honors her and in some way keeps her song, and her love, alive.