Just Thinking

It’s a beautiful day.  Almost summer.  The windows are open and a breeze full of newly cut grass is wafting across my keyboard.  My husband is outside working on the lawn, my Mom is in the kitchen making her “second” breakfast of the day, and I am typing, wondering where this piece will head.

I could talk about politics, and I will a bit, but aside from the disgust at the current occupant of the White House, I won’t go too far into that topic.  Suffice it to say, he must be voted out of office if the United States of America stands for anything good and decent.  I am a strong believer that the last election was an anomaly.  Between the Russian interference and a baggage laden Democratic nominee, whether called for or not, we were doomed.  Coming off of a successful, dynamic, brilliant President, who happened to be a man of color, the racists were motivated…and they sure got their guy.  But, I am hopeful that America is not the land of Trump.  We are mostly a kind, compassionate, giving people.  We believe in democratic principles and will work tirelessly for fairness and respect. 

Most commentators are stressing that we have to reach the trump voters and get them to see the error of their way.  I think that’s nuts. Anyone still standing with that ‘man’, despite all we know along with all he is working so hard to hide, is lost.  Forget them.  Motivate OUR base, which is bigger, younger, and brighter.  I believe we need a candidate that will bring that base to the polls, forget the trumpers….forget them!!  We tried a middle of the road candidate many times.  Gore ran from Clinton and his popularity, chose Lieberman as his running mate…it was too close and we lost either through manipulation or lies, but we lost.  Then we chose John Kerry.  He was middle of the road, a nice guy, a good man, we lost.  Then we had a motivating, inspiring candidate and we won, twice!!  Then we went back to middle of the road, leaned toward compromise even though the other side NEVER compromises…we may have won the popular vote, but we lost where it mattered.  So, middle of the road doesn’t work!! It doesn’t motivate our base!  Will we ever learn?

Yes, Biden leads all other candidates at this point and the media is running with that.  But if you add up all the other percentages over the major polls, Biden stands at somewhere between 22 and 30% of Democrats.  That means that 70% of Democrats are choosing someone else!!  Where is that discussion in the media?  And why are we so hell bent on polls when the last election sure didn’t prove to be a 96% chance of a Hillary Presidency!!

Don’t get me wrong, I admire Vice President Biden.  He’s been through so many horrific tragedies and I know he’s a good, decent, loving man.  I’d have no problem voting for him.  But, will he motivate the base?  I am looking forward to the first round of debates to give air time to some we haven’t heard much from.  The field is open and so is my mind.  Anyone is better than trump.  Elizabeth Warren has “a plan for that”!  I love her enthusiasm and her zest for fighting back!  But all will shake out soon. 

All of this political drama plays out daily, but in the midst of the chaos I am trying to both reflect and plan.  Reflecting gets harder over time, maybe because there’s more time to reflect or maybe because there are less options to make that thinking process relevant.  For example, I used to think about where my life was heading.  Should I go back to school and further my journalism credentials?  I am into politics, could I be a political writer?  Should I go back to school and become a therapist, a lawyer, a chef??  I know the professions are so different but they all grabbed my interest and I always thought I would go into one of them, I didn’t.  Life happened one day at a time and now, it’s too late.  In my early 60’s I’m not about to become any of those things.

To reflect on my history is just to make me aware of how I’ve allowed my day-to-day life to become my life.  I heard an interesting quote the other day by Wayne Dwyer.  I was listening to a talk he gave years ago, as he has already passed on.  In that talk he said, “Am I going to live 90 years or 1 year 90 times”?  That sentence really hit me.  I don’t mean this to sound like I hold regrets over my life.  I absolutely do not.  My family, my children, my grandson, my friends, they are the most important part of my life, and as long as I live, they always will be.  However, wondering what I am here to contribute to society and how to break free of the mental chains that I locked on to myself that kept me from doing more, learning more, growing more….and to keep others from falling into that hole, that is what this is about. 

Time is funny, no one knows how much they have.  The joy of growing old is that you don’t die young.  But as I head into the older years, before I let more time slip away, day to day, before some illness or mental decline steals time, what do I do?

I don’t have the extra money to just travel and learn about other cultures first hand.  I don’t have that freedom to work for charity.  I can’t feed the homeless or go to the border and demand that the children taken from their mothers and fathers be united IMMEDIATELY!!  So, what can I do?

I can write this blog.  I can reach people who I will never meet.  Perhaps some 30 something year-old somewhere will start that course to be who they want to be.  Don’t let mental restrictions keep you from being, keep you from learning, keep you from exploring who you are and who you want to become.  Take time while you have time to go inside and listen to your heart.  Where is it leading you, then follow it, beat by beat until you realize that each year you are learning and growing and changing and you are living 90 different years, not simply repeating the same year 90 times. 

Where does that leave me?  Well, on this beautiful day, I am just thankful.  In the end, yes, I could have been something additional…. but inside, in the deepest part of my soul, I am a Mom.  I send gratitude and love to my husband who afforded me the luxury of being a full-time Mom when they were small.  My contribution to this world, when all is said and done, is the goodness, hard-work, love and intelligence that my children strive for and exude every day.

I can be an armchair politician, cook to my hearts content, talk through problems with friends, and fulfill the different aspects of unfulfilled professional goals.  

But me…..I guess my plan and hope for the future is for more time to spend with those I love and to try to spread that love to those around me who will spread it to those around them. I suppose the only thing that will set this world right again is to love others as you love your own.  (And to vote out trump in the next election!!)

Now, I’ll head outside and enjoy this beautiful day!  Hope your day is full of happiness!