Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Ouch!!




I’ve worked for over a year and a half at a job where I was bending, lifting, stretching, schlepping, moving and stacking and all was well.  I was tired, but I could point to why.  I started my new job, a desk job, about 7 weeks ago.  I come in, I sit, I type, I sit, I eat, I sit…my back went out.  Now, when I say my back went out, I don’t mean a little backache that two Advil will vanish. No, I mean a backache where movement is impossible.
Friday morning I woke up, after struggling with minor to medium back issues the entire week, with a back spasm.  The spasm passed and so I ventured into the shower hoping the warm water would make everything better and I could head to work.  I showered, dried my hair and although in some discomfort, I thought it was manageable, so, I went, slowly, to the kitchen to make my morning coffee.  I cleaned the coffee grounds, poured a cup and started the walk up the stairs to put on my make-up.  Half way up, a spasm hit that literally threw me to the floor writhing in pain.  I have no idea how I managed to put my full coffee cup down on the step above me, not spilling a drop.  (Not that it really mattered; my carpets are ruined from my dog).  I couldn’t move.  The slightest inch of motion set my back into non-stop spasms that took my breath away, not in a good way.  I broke out in a sweat.  My husband ran from the kitchen to help me and I must have awakened my daughter as she came out of her room to see what was going on.  For over 20 minutes I remained on that middle step, couldn’t go up, couldn’t go down.  Finally, I slithered to the first floor then crawled on hands and knees, slowly and extremely painfully to the sofa. 
I was clueless about how I was going to get myself off the floor and onto the sofa.  But, with motions slower than a 100-year-old woman, I lifted one hand, then the other to the couch.  I braced for the pain.  With my feet finally touching the ground, as opposed to my knees, I pushed off and found myself half on, half off the way too soft cushions.  My sofa, the sofa I fell in love with for its soft comfort, was suddenly painfully soft. It took about five minutes, but I finally cornered myself into the nook of the sofa, the very spot where the arm meets the cushions.  I was upright, in agony, but upright.
All of this happened and it was only 7:15 in the morning.  I called my doctor’s office only to learn they didn’t open for another hour.  I realized I had to call out of work.  Like I said, this is a new job and I honestly had not expected to miss any time at this early stage.  Luckily, I had put all the necessary numbers into my IPhone, so I called and left messages for all concerned.
Now it was just a matter of waiting for the doctor’s office to open.  As the minutes crawled by, I eventually made it to the magical minute.  I called and the nurse said, “Hold please”.  There was no choice in the matter.  So, there I sat, on my too soft sofa, the spasms coming and sometimes going, and I held on – for dear life.
When she finally came back on the line I told her of my distress.  She looked up my records and said I hadn’t been in to see the doctor in about a year and that he probably wouldn’t be able to do anything because of that.  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing and I was in no mood.  I told her I have been going to this doctor for over 20 years and that I have NEVER called like this.  I continued by asking her what she thought I should do?  Just remain in agony? Her tone became quite combative when she said, begrudgingly, that she would speak to the doctor and that I should try the pharmacy in an hour to see if anything was called in.  That was it.  She hung up.
So, there I was, still in agony, after having survived the hour waiting for the doctor’s office to open only to learn that I needed to wait another hour to see if the doctor would do anything for me!  I held back the tears.
Being the impatient person I am, I waited about 37 minutes, not that I was counting.  I couldn’t wait anymore soI called the pharmacy, it was 10 minutes to nine.  A recording!  The pharmacy didn’t open until 9:00! 
Forced to wait now, I told my daughter and husband to do what they needed to do and just leave me with the house phone and my cell.  Once alone I realized I should turn the television on, maybe it would pass the time, but, the remote was across the room. 
Cautiously, but determinedly, I inched my legs further toward the front edge of the sofa cushion.  Then, with one hand on the arm and the other on the seat, I pushed myself to a standing position.  I did it!  I was standing - like a real person!  I took a step, then another until I slowly reached the remote, which was sitting in front of the television (which come to think of it is a really silly place to keep the remote.)
I bent to get it – BIG MISTAKE!!  HUGE MISTAKE!!  GIGANTUAN MISTAKE!!  The spasms started again, one after another, I didn’t know what to do.  All I could feel was the pain, the waves of excruciating horror that rendered me useless once again.
It felt like hours but it was only about 2 minutes until the spasms let up long enough for me to fall back onto the sofa.  Afraid to breathe, I waited until 9 AM.
Once the time arrived, I called.  A man with a charming Russian accent answered the phone.  I told him my sad story and asked if there was a prescription waiting for me.  I held my breath, hope in my heart, until he came back on the phone to tell me there was nothing!  Nothing!!
I thanked him for checking and hung up.  I called my doctor’s office again.  A different nurse picked up and she told me the doctor said he would call something in, but that he was with a patient and I should just be patient.  I asked her how long she thought it would be.  She said to give him a half hour.  ANOTHER HALF HOUR!
I waited, I called the pharmacy, the doctor hadn’t called anything in.  I called the doctor back.  The first nurse answered again.  She seemed surprised that someone had told me he would call something in.  I told her to please check because I was in agony.  She put me on hold, came back and told me he had just called it in – then she hung up.
I called the pharmacy again and the gentleman with the Russian accent answered once again.  It was as if he had no idea about my story!  I went through the whole thing again and he told me to hold on.  He checked and said to me – “No, there is nothing here for a Michael…Michael- my son’s name!  How did he get that?  I had to correct him and he looked again, no, nothing.  I hung up; maybe it was just too soon after the doctor’s call.  More time passed…I called back and miracle of miracles the prescription was called in – but it would take about a half hour to fill!
My husband went to the pharmacy to wait so it wouldn’t take an extra second.  He called me from there to say he told the Russian man to let him know when it was ready.  (There was no one in the store).
As he was waiting there, our phone rang….it was the pharmacy.  The pharmacist, a woman, was calling to tell me the prescription had been phoned in.  I told her I knew and that my husband was already at the pharmacy waiting.  Oy.  When I hung up, my husband called immediately and said he couldn’t believe it when he heard her talking to me!  Finally, he came back with muscle relaxers.  Hopeful that one pill would untie the knot that was in my back I swallowed the large pink pill and waited.  Nothing.
My daughter read that I could take Advil with it.  I took two. 
Disheartened, frustrated and in pain I waited.  The pill was to be taken 3 times a day.  My brother was coming to pick up my mother for a weeklong vacation at the beach.  I didn’t want him to see me in my horrible pajamas looking awful, so I bravely went upstairs, slowly and carefully. 
The pills worked in the long run, well enough that I am at least functioning.  It’s now Tuesday, 4 days since that horrendous morning, and I am at work, in my chair, still careful, still hurting, but able to move.  I long for the day when I can just be normal again – a day when the pain in my back is gone. 
To all those who suffer with back pain on a regular basis, you have my respect, sympathy and awe.  The horrific pain causes me to feel useless and lethargic.  I don’t want to risk any movement and that can’t be good for my back – or any part of me – in the long run.
I think maybe working at a desk job may just be hazardous to my health. 
I will never again take feeling normal for granted.  Losing the ability to cross the room, climb the stairs, get dressed – they can go so quickly and easily.  Appreciate health, value and cherish it, for without it, no matter how much money you have, you are broke – literally and figuratively.

Monday, June 11, 2012

Another Day.....Another Email Trail.....



The following is an actual email trail between my husband and I from earlier today.  I know I have not had the opportunity to write on AWomansRoom as often as I had before because of my new full time position.  Becoming adjusted to the job is more of a struggle than anticipated.  Some days, all creativity is sapped from my body, but today I went a little crazy......

Read and please enjoy:

My Husband wrote:  I could use a cookie or 2 right now – I am so hungry!!

I responded:  Did you eat your granola bar?

My Husband wrote:  Yes – I ate that at 10:00!!

I responded:  Hmmmmmm....nothing else hanging around?  You have lunch at noon though, right?  It's only 39 minutes away....not that I'm counting or anything!

My Husband wrote: I can wait until 12:00 – 

I responded:  You may faint from starvation.  Have some fish. 

My Husband wrote:  Ha Ha Fish!!

I responded:  Fish is a dish for which I wish – think there’s a fish knish?

My Husband wrote:  Oy vey!!

I responded:  What can I say...I’ve lost my mind

My Husband wrote: A mind is a terrible thing to waste!

I responded: 

Very true.

Very true…..

I think my mind….

Fell on my shoe……

It’s on my shoe

And now I’m blue

I have no clue

What I should do!

My Husband wrote:  Oy!

I responded:  

Oy is what you said to me

Oy you said so casually

You did not say oh my or such

You used oy as a true crutch

Now I sit here and mull your word

It’s actually a bit absurd

To hear that word in this place

Is like a fish flying through space

It has no place, no meaning here

No one would “get it”..that is clear

They’d think it odd, weird or strange

They’d think I was quite deranged

Perhaps I am, yes, it might be true

And so I’ll say ‘oy’ right back to you!

This is what happens when a new job stresses me out......

Hopefully I'll have more time to write a blog soon!!